Cures for jealousy...
"Let's talk about jealousy or just a simple comparing process: "Oh, now she has a panel of people speaking?? How did that happen?? Oh, now she has a Christmas party, and she even charges for tickets?? Oh, now she does not want to work with me, but she starts a similar project to mine?? Oh, now he copies me after working with me and learning from me??" and on and on and on. Have you ever thought something similar about anyone?? Let me tell you: "I am the first to admit to be guilty." Throw a tomato or a rotten egg at me. lol. Sorry😬
Read till the end to find out the whole story, but first let's start from the beginning. I used to be a jealous bee. In fact, I used to be so jealous of my middle school classmates that they busted me by sending a fake friend asking me all kind of questions and agreeing with me on purpose. That prompted me to talk more and say everything that has been on my mind. (Years later I apologized to that person who I was so jealous of and explained why I did that. It felt good to finally come on good terms:)).
In a matter of fact, someone I trusted with all my heart did something similar to it just a few months ago by asking me all kind of questions over the phone while recording the conversation?? If that recording ever goes public, first I'll refer to this FB post and, second, all I said was not because of jealousy, but because of being hurt by those people. All is well now with majority of those people which makes me so happy:) So, frankly, that recording does not even matter anymore. Although it was "an amazing" learning experience:) lol. It was not that funny at the time😳
The reason I used to be so jealous of people when I was younger because I was dirt poor: no regular food, no good clothes or shoes, let alone popular toys or gadgets. Add to that I was not a popular kid: not with the boys, and I was a pretty ugly child. I wanted all of what they had. I used to lie saying I had it or will have it. It was just a bad case. Then when I went to college I found happiness in making all As (my first college GPA is 4.0), traveling & later learning English.
I stopped being so jealous because luckily when you grow older your possessions don't really matter per say because no one will never know 100% of everything you own or use. What matters is what kind of person you are and what accomplishments you have. Makes it better for me: I am finally proud to say that I am not jealous of people's things. I, frankly, don't care what you have. Because what you want and use may not work for me. I am happy with what I have. As I grew older and have seen, tried & experienced a whole lot, I don't need a lot of stuff. I live a very minimalistic life because I always invest in my businesses to help more and more people. And that what makes me truly happy:)
Back to my jealousy level in 2019. I don't think I ever get jealous. I may get confused, hurt or frustrated, but only for a minute. And then I am back to what I am doing: which is creating, writing, learning, helping people in some way, etc. One minute I may "dwell" on what she does. Another: I focus on what I do that I forget all about her. If I don't work hard enough or discipline myself enough, she/most likely just her project may pop up in my mind. I may make a confused face (like this 😕) to myself, and in just a split second I'll move to my task at hand. Does anyone ever do that or it's just me?? Let me know. I am just wondering if I am the only one crazy. lol.
That being said now when I see people's project I just don't care much. Sometimes when I truly understand the meaning of the project I am like: "Oh, that's cool. It's really needed. Good job, you!" Sometimes I mindlessly scroll without even giving it any attention. Sometimes I am like: "Say what?? Whatever. I am doing a good job with what I do!" The former is the secret cure to all jealousy symptoms says "Dr." Marina Amdream. lol. (You know, I am not a doctor, I am just kidding:)).
What I am trying to tell you and what any successful person will tell you: "Don't focus on what others are doing." Keep working on your dream. Oprah says: "You can't control the other guys. You can only control what you do." I believe in getting inspiration from people - absolutely!! However, don't over do it following others career so much, you completely abandon your own. Then it becomes not looking for an inspiration Instagram scroll - it becomes a pure unhealthy obsession and an unnecessary waste of time. I am the first to admit that IG feed sucks me in very regularly, but I am hoping to learn to control it at some point. I must remind myself who is more important: "Me or a model who I have never met." Of course, me! And you should be more important to yourself. Of course, you are more important than anyone, even me!!!"
If you come across someone doing what you do or wish to do and you may get jealous of them, look at it as the Universe is giving you a challenge to step up your game. Also, I have learned from someone who has MBA here in Arkansas that we must be happy for those people. She says, if you are happy for someone genuinely with all your heart that happiness will come back to you tend folds. I don't know about you, but if a very successful entrepreneur with MBA degree says that, there must be some truth to it:) Don't you think?
If you are struggling with this ugly trait called jealousy, know that you are not alone. Especially, in the world of social media, I believe, it's epidemic. But no one likes jealous people. We all can sense that because we are all connected by energy. If you meet a bitter person because they are always angry or jealous, can't you just tell? Of course, you can. We all are connected by thoughts whether you believe it or not. That's a subject for another discussion:)
I am sure you don't like being jealous yourself. If you do, then, forgive me, I don't get it. Being jealous just does not feel right. It kind of eats you up insight. And we don't want that feeling. We want peace, happiness, sense of self-worth, satisfaction with who we are, what we have and what we have accomplished. If you have the former, doesn't it just feel good?? I am sure, you will have that, and that's what I wish you always:)
I hope this long post helped you rethink a little bit where you are today. This is what my writing is all about. To help you relate to what I say, maybe see yourself in what I write and get inspired to have a look at what you have and who you are. If needed, you are smart; you'll know what to do with your life after reading what I say. Know that no matter how many words I pour out, even if I give you my free book, if you don't take an action toward change, nothing will change. I am just a vessel of education, inspiration & experience. You are the one who has control of your future. Make it a good one! Make it beautiful and meaningful. And per today's point, make it jealousy free:) You can do it!! As always, I believe in you if no one else does!!!" Love and Peace, Marina Amdream.