It's ok not to be ok. It does get better...
"So, yesterday I went to a public place for the first time in a long time, and my mind is blown away: you, guys, read my stuff!! You know it all: what I do, about my ex, about that woman who did not pay me, that I moved, etc. I am like talking to a loving family... I refuse to accept the negative talk about me that is just a part of success and welcome with open arms the good talk which is also a part of success:) Just thank you for reading!😌
What I also learned yesterday is that a year later I am still completely not over him. Every time I meet politicians/judges they remind me of him running for office. The worst part about it is that people to this day associate me with him, and I am not! This is one of the reasons we are not together anymore because at that particular time being a politician's wife was not on my radar. Some women would welcome this opportunity with everything they have got, and I respect that. It is just not what I aspire to be: I am an independent feminist woman that I am very proud of!!! If anyone has a problem with it, we should not be in each others lives. You are happy with your views; I am happy with mine:) We agree to disagree creating a peaceful world where there is a lot of love and less hate. I promote unity in spite of all differences, diversity & happiness, and I hope in some way I am accomplishing that:)
That being said I want to tell you that it's ok not to be ok even if it's for over a year. I believe time will heal. You just need to be patient with it. I learned yesterday that I need more time to completely get over him. How did I learn? Because I mentioned him without realizing it to three people who are running for office, and two happened to know him - terrible feeling you ask me. I don't ever want to be reminded about him. So, I must get over him, so I don't remind myself about him and mention him to other people.
I also think the reason I mention him to other people is, first, because it's part of my story, of course, but then because I maybe insecure, weak, don't love myself enough, or, frankly, not smart enough to keep my mouth shut. Maybe if I work on those areas, I'll be able to hold a conversation with any politician without ever bringing up his name. I want this day to come very soon, and it will. Before it does, forgive me, ya'll. Please don't hold it against me. I also want everyone to know that in spite of our personal life not working out he is an exceptional politician - very good at what he does. If he ever runs again for anything, vote for him without a doubt. You won't be disappointed:)
In spite of missing him to this day I am in a very good place right now. I do what I love, and it makes me so happy:) I wish the same for you. Know that no matter how hard it might be to get over someone the best way to do it is to learn to be ok even if you are not ok and use your gifts with passion to help someone. It will get better. It always does! Just give it time. Remember, to love yourself & be happy with yourself & then you won't need to miss another person and better yet talk about them. It's time to move on, my love. Let's move on together. Shall we? Best of luck to us:)" Love and Peace, Marina Amdream