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  • Marina Amdream/EmroVideos

Let's Talk About Having Friends

"Today I want to talk about having friends: something I have struggled with my whole life. When I was young I always wanted to be friends with popular girls. I was poor, a nerd and never popular. They did not want to be friends with me. So, I just kept it to myself emerging myself in books. Now, as I grow older I meet women who seem always either want to be in competition with me or take time to listen for a few days or months and then start ignoring me for some reason. I have some women I know that are so nice in my face, and then when it comes down to working with me, I don't ever hear from them. So, I have been exploring the subject of friendship lately. Why some people have a lot of friends and some don't have at all or just a few. The more I am learning the more I realize it's nothing to do with people around you; it's everything to do with you. It's all about the way you look at your life or what others are doing. It's also about how you trust and love in general, how much time you are willing to contribute to a relationship, whether you are an introvert or extrovert, did you grow up in a big loving family, etc. I find it very rare if you show you care over and over, people won't notice. The friendship you want may not happen overnight. It may or may not happen at all. But at least you tried. I also discover that friendships can appear out of nowhere when you least expect. Those are the best ones. I want you to know that in order to have friends and people to like you, you must first be happy with yourself, with your life. Right now let's perform Deepak Chopra's exercise: rate your life from 0-10. If you rate it 7,8,9,10, you are doing well. If you rate it lower than that, you might need some work to do. Imagine, you rate your life 10. I am almost certain you have amazing friends in your life. If you score it 0, please ask for help now! Know that life is worth living and enjoying. You must remember that. Another powerful way of having friends or at least be happy in any situation is being aware of what you say to yourself. For example, today I went on social media, and I saw pictures from an amazing event in my community I didn't know about. I saw so many people that I have wished to be friends with. You can refer to the first paragraph why I believe we just know each and are not close. At first it made me sad that I wasn't with them. (Notice this: our natural reaction can be negative, and it's ok as long as we recognize it and correct it after it occurred). So, I started shifting my focus from people who didn't invite me to be with them to the cause of this positive event: made me feel so much better. Then I started saying to myself: "I am happy with what I do. I am doing great!" etc. It made me feel so good, so confident: I got inspired to write this post! The reason I have told you what I have done in the event situation because the way you react to things builds your character, your mind, your outlook on life, you. Imagine, you always focus on a positive in any situation. You will become a positive person. Other people want to be around positive people. Try to be positive:) To sum up my "rant" today I'd say: "Make an effort." Reach out to people you want to be friends with, show them you care. It's not hard to check in with someone. If they don't respond for a long period of time: read the signs. They don't want you: let them go. Like Oprah Winfrey says: "when people show you who they are, believe them." It's ok to let go of someone. It means they were not meant to be in your life. Like Joel Osteen Ministries would say: "They were in your life for a season." Focus on you! Focus on being kind and happy with your work. Take care of your physical and mental health. Help other people. And eventually when you least expect God will send you an amazing friend like He did to me - Ms. Betty Brown. Treasure your friends: they are the jewel of your heart. Bless others and be blessed. And this, my friends, is how you have and, most importantly, keep friends..." Marina Amdream

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